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Jedi Robes... bargain basement sale! (Spontaneous question) - The Phantom Librarian
Spewing out too many words since November 2003
fernwithy
fernwithy
Jedi Robes... bargain basement sale! (Spontaneous question)
In honor of both Star Wars and Odyssey of the Mind (mentioned in the previous post), I thought I'd do a SW-related spontaneous question.

For those unfamiliar with the concept, spontaneous questions are brainstorming sessions. In competition, you have about five minutes to come up with as many answers as possible, one point for each unique answer, three for creative ones (or at least that's how it was in the dim days when I did it). Here, I'll just let it keep going. Say anything, even if it's dumb. The point is to get tons of short answers out without thinking.

The question:
As titti (I think) pointed out, the Jedi have a problem. They wear great heavy cloaks, and must remove them before battle. They rarely have a chance to retrieve them. Therefore, the entire galaxy must be absolutely littered with Jedi robes. Your question: what happens to them?

Answer at will, with as many ideas as you want.
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persephone_kore From: persephone_kore Date: June 1st, 2005 07:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
People collect them. Like butterflies. There are many collections throughout the galaxy of Jedi robes pinned to sturdy mounting boards, each neatly labeled with the location found and the known or speculated identity and measurements of the Jedi.
ashtur From: ashtur Date: June 1st, 2005 07:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
They end up in the costume departments of all the galactic high schools for productions of Don Quixote
laureate05 From: laureate05 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
They are biodegradeable because they're actually made of an extremely heavy type of paper.

They have lo-jacks and a collection service goes and picks them up later.

They are themselves lifeforms and if removed before a battle, they gain their freedom, kind of like giving a house elf clothes.

Street children collect them and use them as make-shift houses.

They're edible to most alien species and a delicacy on some planets.
persephone_kore From: persephone_kore Date: June 1st, 2005 08:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
...I think "They're edible..." is my favorite yet.
wendynat From: wendynat Date: June 1st, 2005 08:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
There's a great market for them, actually. People retrieve them and toss them in a dryer on "high", shrinking them down enough that they can then sell them for big bucks to Jawas.
daisan From: daisan Date: June 1st, 2005 09:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha! Excellent!
persephone_kore From: persephone_kore Date: June 1st, 2005 08:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
Somewhere, there is an entire planet made of fabric...
jesspallas From: jesspallas Date: June 1st, 2005 08:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
They are retrieved by Intergalatic charities and passed on to needy Jawas.

Or due to close proximity to a strong wielder of the force, they develop a mystical life of their own, rise again when removed and flock in search of new Jedi Masters upon which to rest for a time.....
sannalim From: sannalim Date: June 1st, 2005 08:06 pm (UTC) (Link)
Scavenger service. One of the many opportunities available to Jedi youth who are not accepted as Padawans is a job hunting out lost robes, laundering them, and returning them to the Jedi temple. Sort of like a scrap iron salvage company...only not.

If I have any more ideas later, I shall return.
purple_ladybug1 From: purple_ladybug1 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:07 pm (UTC) (Link)
1. The set crew removes them when the scene is over
2. They have a Force-attracting thread woven through so that when left alone for too long, they're automatically drawn to a Temple or other place with lots of Jedi.
3. They're made of Earth-friendly material and are recycled into the Earth automatically.
4. Whoever cleans up battle scenes (hello, someone's gotta take care of the dead bodies) collects all the cloaks and gives them to charities or uses them for cleaning rags.
5. Off-camera, the Jedi use the Force to draw their cloaks back.
6. The bad guys keep them as a consolation prize.
7. Droids collect them to polish themselves.

Oops, I forgot to keep time. I think that was five minutes.
purple_ladybug1 From: purple_ladybug1 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
By Earth, I mean planet. I sorta forgot this is an inter-galactic kinda thing.
ashtur From: ashtur Date: June 1st, 2005 08:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
Nothing, they just sit there. Jedi's are required to leave them behind, do to a law the senate passed 1730 years ago, when the galactic fabric industry was in a recession. It is a little known fact that the manufacture of Jedi cloaks constituted 1.78% of the Gross Galactic Product (GGP) in the year before the acession of Emperor Palpatine.
laureate05 From: laureate05 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
Nazgul and Dementors gather them, dye them black, and destress them.
drakyndra From: drakyndra Date: June 2nd, 2005 08:20 am (UTC) (Link)
Best. Answer. Ever.
parallactic From: parallactic Date: June 1st, 2005 08:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
Picked up, recycled into new clothes.

The cloaks have a little label stating who the owner is and the owner's address. ;)

The Jedi have little collection bins all over the galaxy for this case.

The Jedi or the opponent trips over the cloak in the fight, and breaks their neck. If it's the Jedi, then he won't need the cloak. If it's the opponent, then the Jedi picks up his cloak.

Enterprising con men pick them up and pass themselves off as Jedi.

Homeless people use them for blankets and clothing. When people spot the cloak, they ask, "Are you homeless, or are you a Jedi?" The Jedi wince and groan whenever they hear another, "How is a Jedi like the homeless," jokes.

The cloak is actually a force generated illusion. There are no cloaks. Part of Jedi training is to trick other people into seeing cloaks. They 'take them off' before battle because it looks cool, and so they can concentrate on fighting instead of generating fake clothing. Plus, the Jedi council saves a bunch on clothing.

purple_ladybug1 From: purple_ladybug1 Date: June 1st, 2005 11:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, you definitely have some of the best so far.
(Deleted comment)
laureate05 From: laureate05 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
They double as death shrouds for fallen Jedi, kinda like old timey mariners with their hammocks.
gryffin23 From: gryffin23 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think that's where the Jawas get their robes on Tatooine. They are scavengers after all.

Also, maybe they are cleaner droids or retriever droids that are meant to do just that, go round finding Jedi cloaks.

Or maybe there's a sort of OxFam type gathering that gathers up the Jedi robes.

Or smugglers and unscrupulous persons who pick them up and sell them back to Jedi at ridiculous prices.

Perhaps mynocks use them for nests.

Those are my ideas for the moment.
awaywithpixie From: awaywithpixie Date: June 1st, 2005 08:24 pm (UTC) (Link)
*You don't need to concern yourself with that question.*
*This is no Jedi cloak left behind after battle.*
*There is nothing to see here, move along.*

persephone_kore From: persephone_kore Date: June 1st, 2005 08:25 pm (UTC) (Link)
These are not the garments you're looking for?
pen_and_umbra From: pen_and_umbra Date: June 1st, 2005 08:25 pm (UTC) (Link)
Gungans recycle them as handkerchiefs.

"Accio cloak!"

As it is with going to the toilet, cloak retrieval is just one of those things that is not shown on screen.
laureate05 From: laureate05 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:26 pm (UTC) (Link)
My little cousins use them to make pillow forts.
fenellaevangela From: fenellaevangela Date: June 1st, 2005 08:27 pm (UTC) (Link)
The robes are actually illusions that the jedi create so they can look cool and intimidating when they shrug them off. Once the jedi start fighting, they can no longer maintain the illusion, and the robes vanish. WoOoOoO!
maple_clef From: maple_clef Date: June 1st, 2005 08:30 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, I should like to think they were recycled - biodegradeable, at least... Perhaps something to keep the midichlorians busy when they're not occupied with "immaculate conceptions" ;D

Or, after a long, long time they develop a life of their own, and cross over to Potterverse and start a new life as Lethifolds...
drakyndra From: drakyndra Date: June 2nd, 2005 08:24 am (UTC) (Link)
So that's where Lethifolds come from. I wonder why the act so evil though? I mean smothering people and all.

Have the cloaks turned to the Drak Side? Might explain the whole "lack of air" thing...
(Deleted comment)
marycontraria From: marycontraria Date: June 1st, 2005 10:07 pm (UTC) (Link)
I LOVE YOUR ICON!! (I get your icon.)
thalia_seawood From: thalia_seawood Date: June 1st, 2005 08:37 pm (UTC) (Link)
They're Jedi robes - so they become one with the force when they have been abandonned.

Or maybe there's something similar to the javas on Tatooine travelling all over the galaxy, collecting Jedi robes, cleaning them, and selling them back to the Jedi. (Some of the robes are probably sold on the black market to certain etablishments where it's considered *hot* to dress up as a Jedi.)

kinderjedi From: kinderjedi Date: June 1st, 2005 08:46 pm (UTC) (Link)
They are collected by galactic theater owners and rented to their patrons, who otherwise would be frozen by the middle of the show because the air conditioning is set on sub-arctic.

laureate05 From: laureate05 Date: June 1st, 2005 08:56 pm (UTC) (Link)
Franciscan missionaries find them and use them as spares.
lannamichaels From: lannamichaels Date: June 1st, 2005 09:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
I always figured the Jedi remembered to force-summon them before leaving the planet. *tries to think of something funny*
daisan From: daisan Date: June 1st, 2005 09:01 pm (UTC) (Link)

Fun! I can procrastinate editing my book!

Trained droids, with special "600 thread count" sensors, comb the galaxy and retrieve Jedi cloaks. These are then taken back to the Temple, where they are redistributed to any Jedi who request them.

Like his lightsaber, a Jedi's cloak is unique and special to him/her. One of the many duties of a Padawan is to "sense" through the Force the location of his/her master's cloak, and retrieve it, often at great risk to life and limb. This helps the Padawan learn the particular skills of stealth and bravery they need to become a knight.

The cloaks are heavy for a reason: their hems contain homing devices. When a Jedi leaves his cloak behind, he simply activates the homing device and the cloaks up and zoom their way into space, returning via pre-navigated space channels to their owners home planets.

On many worlds, a Jedi cloak is an object of great power. Apothecaries pay top dollar for such cloaks, the fibers of which are ground up and sold on the black market in libido-enhancing elixirs.

Although we would like to think that everything associated with Jedi has a special place in the universe, the truth is that most cloaks are simply tossed in rubbish heaps and disintegrate into fertilizer just like all other organic materials. Some might have the glory of being cut and made into quilts or diapers for infants, though their color and coarseness makes the cloaks rather unfit for such uses. Still, whether recycled into a homeless man's blanket or burned to cinders, the cloaks meet their end without fanfare or legend. However, (and this is by no means verified by scientific evidence, mind you) tales have come of hallowed ground where the voices of dead Jedi can be heard, or of farms where the crops grow higher and healthier than surrounding areas. The only commonality found among these places? They were once garbage mounds on planets where Jedi left cloaks.


daisan From: daisan Date: June 1st, 2005 09:05 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Fun! I can procrastinate editing my book!

Boo, forgot about the time limit. All but the last one were typed up off the top of my head.
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