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Sue meme - The Phantom Librarian
Spewing out too many words since November 2003
Sue meme
Nicked from violet_quill

A re-circulation of the old meme where you go to FFN and search HP for Sues with your name. Alas, both my real name and my pseud are pretty boring, and "fern" apparently means something in German, so I got a lot of German language fics.

Fern is just an ordinary muggle, but what will happen when she passes through the gateway that leads to platform 9 3/4? What will she think of the infamous harry Potter? and what will she think about Malfoy?
That the former is pretty cool and the latter is a FREAKING DEATH EATER, thanks.

Meet Fern Michaels. She's Harry's summer protector, or so she says. Harry wants to trust her, but how can he when he finds out the truth--that she knows all of his enemies, especially the Malfoys. What does she have to with Lord Voldemort? READ, please
I'm sensing a dangerous connection of my pseud (and the full name of a famous romance author) with the Malfoys. This doesn't bode well.

It's the marauder's final year of Hogwarts, and Emily Fern, and exchange student from America, decides that Lily and James' lovelives, or lackthereof, need a boost. Little does she know that a certain playboy has his sights on her . . . CHAPTER TWO UP

Real name:
Sirius asks James to fix his little friend. Bear in mind that Barbara is NOT some OC Mary-Sue. WARNING: This fic contains sheepishness. Stay away if you have a tendancy to try out everything you read.
I think that may well be the only time I've seen a "sheepishness warning."

I had to resort to nicknames I don't use to get anything really funny:
Draco is the new owner of…a diary with BARBIE on the front cover! O.O OOCness BEWARE!

Hermione changes into a Barbie and learns alot of funny things about everyone around her.

Draco's gone for a visit to the Burrow. Things get started when he mistakes a Barbie Doll for his mother, but they really get going with a bottle of whiskey.

Uhhhh Snape meets tellytubbies, Harry becomes an Ol' G....Hermione kidnaps a real live barbie doll...just your average meetings between normal people...

Everyone's favorite Dark wizard, accompanied by Wormtail, sings Barbie Girl. ; ' )

Hermione is picked on by Harry, Draco and Ron. She wants to kill herself, but stumbles along a creature named Babs. Is Babs real, or just made up by Hermione? R&R! First story, so plz don't be too mean!
19 comments or Leave a comment
(Deleted comment)
darreldoomvomit From: darreldoomvomit Date: August 3rd, 2005 04:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
on the other hand, the suethor sould easlily have randomly chosen a irish name from babynames.com.
(Deleted comment)
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: August 3rd, 2005 05:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, you could spell it semi-phonetically, I guess. Any Finolas?

(And yeah... the Suethors get a little intimidated by actual exotic names, as opposed to faux-exotic ones like "Raven."
From: sleepingfingers Date: August 3rd, 2005 04:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
The summaries with Barbie are hilarious. A bit scary, but hilarious. :D

I tried searching by my names, both real and fandom names, but alas, they seem to be too uncommon to have any fic with them in it. I'm not sure if I should be relieved by this or not. :)
From: marciamarcia Date: August 3rd, 2005 04:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hee. This is fun. I had no idea what all I was up to in fandom, but I apparently lead a very busy life. Watch me:

Hook up (or not) with Bill Weasley
Maggie and Bill start to find out they like each other, but what happens after she chickens out when he tries to kiss her? It's the end of her seventh year and she doesn't know what to do. But what happens when several years later they meet again?

Be Harry's child
Harry and Ginny's children, Maggie and James, have lead a fairly sheltered life in the country, away from the wizard press.

Be Harry's girlfriend...or possibly his faghag
So this is my first fic and new girl maggie is falling in love with Harry...but things start to switch up in later chaps...will update soon promise slash pending

Vacation on Privet Drive (!!?), with sass
Maggie is your average 15 year old girl... until her boring vacation at #3 privet drive becomes something more when the strange boy next door reveals somehing unexpected // warning: includes lots of frustration at the magical world and a bit of sass. ;)

Show up Oliver Wood
Oliver has been pushed aside on Puddlemere by Maggie Karino for three years... but is there more to this then jealousy?

Be Hermione's sister (and, probably, Harry's girlfriend. Again.)
Maggie Granger is tired of always being second to her sister. This time when the request to attend Hogwarts comes by owl, she accepts. maybe someone there could see her as more than Hermoine's sister, and maybe one boy does

kismeteve From: kismeteve Date: August 4th, 2005 02:30 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh man, I love your icon. Where can I get one like it?
maple_clef From: maple_clef Date: August 3rd, 2005 04:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
Sirius asks James to fix his little friend
Er. O__o

I like the claims of "this OC is NOT A MARY SUE!" Methinks the author doth protest too much ;)

I seem to remember from my dim and distant GSCE German days that 'fern' is Deutsch for TV...
wychwood From: wychwood Date: August 3rd, 2005 05:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think "fern" = "far"; TV is Fernsehen, which means far-seer(in fact, much like the word television).
maple_clef From: maple_clef Date: August 3rd, 2005 05:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
Ah, yes - fernsehen - that's it! Thanks for correcting me :) I was thinking of the phrase "ich sehe gern fern", which splits the noun up into its components. Logical language, German :D
darreldoomvomit From: darreldoomvomit Date: August 3rd, 2005 05:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
Omg! I'm Sirius' twin sister!!! Dude, I had no idea.

Lise by Lise Black
Basically this is a story following Lise Black (Sirius Black's twin sister) and the maurader through their years at Hogwarts

and also, Draco's best friend. I must be a true Black.

Draco finds out a shocking secret from his best friend, Annelise. Soon he finds out that he can deal with it, but his father can't, as well as his "former" friends.
mysticblueside From: mysticblueside Date: August 3rd, 2005 05:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
A warbing for SHEEPISHNESS? That had me in stitches! a;lkdl;aksld;kas;d!
a_t_rain From: a_t_rain Date: August 3rd, 2005 08:30 pm (UTC) (Link)
Maybe they think "sheepishness" is a genteel way of saying "practicing inappropriate charms on a sheep"?
mafdet From: mafdet Date: August 3rd, 2005 06:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think that "Snape meets the Teletubbies" would be hilarious.
galaxianomiko From: galaxianomiko Date: August 3rd, 2005 08:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
Best meme ever! You got better results than me, though. And I kept having to wade through Michelle Branch songfics. >_
marycontraria From: marycontraria Date: August 3rd, 2005 08:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
Leith turned up nothing, and as my first name that I don't actually go by is, in fact, Mary... I got every single summary claiming that its protagonist was not a Mary Sue. I didn't even bother wading through the first page. :(
eir_de_scania From: eir_de_scania Date: August 3rd, 2005 08:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
Aaahhh, I'm almost sorry none of my names turn up at FFN. Some of your adventures seem rather fun!

So Fern was an exchange student at Hogwarts. I suppose it was Madam Pince who inspired you to become a librarian?
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: August 3rd, 2005 08:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
I suppose it was Madam Pince who inspired you to become a librarian?

Madam Pince is the enemy of librarians everywhere!!!!

:headdesk, because she exists out there:
olympe_maxime From: olympe_maxime Date: August 4th, 2005 01:43 am (UTC) (Link)


Speaking as someone who hates the thought of books being written on (except.. er.. notebooks), I want to know why HBP has suddenly made Irma Pince an unsympathetic character to fans. Grrr.

And for the record, I think Pince/Filch was a totally made up thing. You know how kids are. Wild rumours everywhere.

danaedark From: danaedark Date: August 4th, 2005 01:38 am (UTC) (Link)
Nada under my pseud (altho there apparently alot of *authors* out there with some version of it -- I had no idea!) However, under the real name:

I am: a first-year at Hogwarts with an obsession for an OC Ravenclaw; a 15-year-old Mary-Sue who is the object of Harry's love; a seventh year at Hogwarts during the Marauder period; a seventh year Slytherin (last name of Grima!) with a crush on Sirius; Harry's older sister; and a Hogwarts Professor; and (drumroll please) a traitor spent to spy on Harry, who then falls in love with him, named "Kim Pettigrew"!
dalf From: dalf Date: August 4th, 2005 09:31 am (UTC) (Link)
Ok here we go: [It seems scott is a better last name than a first]

* NOT PART OF SERIES! Elvira Scott is returning to Hogwarts for her 6th year. Since the incident at the Ministry, Harry Potter has developed a bad rep in her eyes, and she dislikes him a lot. But this year might change her mind...

* Sirius Black and Mary Scott have always spent most of the time playing pranks on each other and causing the other problems. But what happens when suddenly they no longer see the other as odd or and enemy and begin to learn a valuable lesson from the other

Oh it seems I shoudl ph33r the x-men crossover (this does cause tEh Phear!)

* X-men evolution crossover 15 year old Scott Summers is called on to protect a young wizard in the magic world, follow his adventures, friendships, and everything in between.

19 comments or Leave a comment