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What would you do if you were JKR? - The Phantom Librarian
Spewing out too many words since November 2003
fernwithy
fernwithy
What would you do if you were JKR?
So JKR has caught some flak for vandalizing a hotel statue, thereby assuring the hotel that it can make mad money on E-bay.

Granted, silly and juvenile, but let's be honest... finishing a decade and a half of work is bound to make a person giddy.

So, if you were JKR and you had more money than the queen and had finished work on the HP series, going from obscurity to brand-name status, semi-poor to filthy rich... what silly, goofy, juvenile thing would you do to celebrate?
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Comments
buongiornodaisy From: buongiornodaisy Date: February 7th, 2007 11:06 pm (UTC) (Link)
Knowing me, I wouldn't celebrate. I'd cry. And get drunk for the first time in my life.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 7th, 2007 11:45 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'd start the crying jag the next day. But, yeah, totally drunk. On the good stuff. Possibly carried to me by the finest-looking gentlemen in the realm.
miss_daizy From: miss_daizy Date: February 8th, 2007 12:27 am (UTC) (Link)
You read my mind :)
From: (Anonymous) Date: February 8th, 2007 09:12 am (UTC) (Link)
And the next finest gentlemen for my friends. I hear it is not good to drink alone and I would want to celebrate with my buds.

Katsulas
leeflower From: leeflower Date: February 7th, 2007 11:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
I would go down to the desk, ask to speak to the manager, and present him with a framed, hand-written note that I finished the book in that hotel. Date, time, room number. Then I'd tell the manager I'd be sending over a case of signed copies, to be handed out to Young Adults who stay in that room in the future.

I'd also steal the Gideon Bible, but I always do that. There's a chance I'd buy everyone at the nearest pub a round.

but hey, I figure if the hotel's not pissed about it, I shouldn't be obligated to care at all. So I don't.
starbrow From: starbrow Date: February 7th, 2007 11:30 pm (UTC) (Link)
No Gideon Bibles in hotels in the UK!

This has been your random trivia for today. :)
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 7th, 2007 11:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, then, clearly roo would have to come over here just to steal one. ;p
leeflower From: leeflower Date: February 7th, 2007 11:52 pm (UTC) (Link)
oh, hey, true. Hm.

I'd pay the Gideons to donate a bible to my room.

Then I'd steal it.
From: rosathome Date: February 11th, 2007 03:28 am (UTC) (Link)
Yes there are!
shiiki From: shiiki Date: February 7th, 2007 11:27 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh, honestly. Haven't people got better things to do than nitpick on JKR?

*shakes head*

I bet the hotel is pretty damn happy about it, anyway!
starbrow From: starbrow Date: February 7th, 2007 11:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
Anyone who's giving her flak is kind of silly -- that statue won't have been worth much of anything before, but it will be now!

(God, like the Balmoral need to eBay something -- I see more likely a private auction in about a hundred years or so. long after JKR and everyone who read the books as they came out are dead. After spending that time inbetween leaving it on display, possibly behind glass after a few neds attempt to steal it so they can sell it on eBay themselves, of course. Or alternatively, it will be quietly donated to a museum, possibly the National Gallery of Scotland, and become a prime tourist attraction.)

So if I were JKR, ending the Harry Potter series in the Balmoral Hotel, I would probably go over to the Waterstones across the street, and, carefully in disguise, quietly autograph every single copy of every Harry Potter book they have, and see if I could get away with it before anybody realised who I was.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 7th, 2007 11:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
I don't know if I could have resisted that urge as long as she apparently has, honestly... ;p

Actually, I'd guess the hotel is serious about just squirreling it away somewhere as a conversation piece. As hotel vandalism goes, I'm sure they've seen worse.
persephone_kore From: persephone_kore Date: February 7th, 2007 11:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
So if I were JKR, ending the Harry Potter series in the Balmoral Hotel, I would probably go over to the Waterstones across the street, and, carefully in disguise, quietly autograph every single copy of every Harry Potter book they have, and see if I could get away with it before anybody realised who I was.

This is hilarious. I like your idea.
izhilzha From: izhilzha Date: February 7th, 2007 11:50 pm (UTC) (Link)
I second this! Whee! :-D
dreagoddess From: dreagoddess Date: February 8th, 2007 12:49 am (UTC) (Link)
I would totally do that! Actually, when I'd be in the bookstore when I was younger and thinking about when my book was on the shelves, I'd go in incognito and autograph them, then watch and see who bought them and if they noticed. *g*

...Oh my God, I just realized what an utter geek I am.
leelastarsky From: leelastarsky Date: February 7th, 2007 11:31 pm (UTC) (Link)
Um... not sure I'd go so far as scribbling on a statue... Then again, if I were in the postition she was, who knows?
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 7th, 2007 11:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
I suspect it was just one of those mass-produced statuette things; not like she's scribbling on David or something. ;P

I think I'd feel a need to mark something permanently. With fanfic, I'm satisfied to do it on LJ. If I finished a madly popular series? Dude, I'd be tempted to sky-write it!

I don't know... I don't normally approve of vandalism, but in this case, I find it weirdly endearing, because it's just such a down-to-earth thing to do. Like, "OMG!!! I FINISHED IT!!!" Like anyone else getting giddy. And probably tipsy.
(Deleted comment)
honorh From: honorh Date: February 8th, 2007 12:43 am (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, I'm thinking she hit the mini-bar to the point that writing on the statue seemed like a dandy idea. Hell's bells, there's plenty of worse stuff she could've done!
From: (Anonymous) Date: February 8th, 2007 09:19 am (UTC) (Link)
I like the sky writing...that was the 1st thing that came to mind as I was reading the 1st couple of comments.

I think this is the best. Just to see it in the sky in great big letters to help it sink in.

katsulas
(Deleted comment)
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 7th, 2007 11:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
HA! Yeah, I like that.
olympe_maxime From: olympe_maxime Date: February 7th, 2007 11:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
I *heart* that!!

:D Whytf are people giving her flak anyway? Don't they get it? It's not vandalism if *she* does it!

I am given to big grand gestures. The day I finished my A-levels (big year 12 exams) I burned all my notes and textbooks in a bonfire outside my apartment. Which is a big deal when you consider I was living in Singapore at the time, and could well have been arressted for it. :P

So I'd write on the statue, yeah. And the walls, too, probably. I've got money coming out the wazoo after all!
(Deleted comment)
saeva From: saeva Date: February 8th, 2007 12:46 am (UTC) (Link)
After the AP Euro exam, the teacher at my high school actually organized a bonfire on the beach so that everyone could burn their notes in symbolic rebellion. He does it every year. It's kinda an awesome tradition.

- Andrea.
summoner_lenne9 From: summoner_lenne9 Date: March 2nd, 2008 02:40 am (UTC) (Link)
This is over a year late, I know- I don't care- my AP Euro teacher was gonna burn my Insane Folder Of Doom once the school year was done, but alas, didn't. I was very sad about this.
(Deleted comment)
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 8th, 2007 12:00 am (UTC) (Link)
I love school graffiti. There used to be great, huge debates on the walls of the library stalls at Tufts. They weren't there the last time I went. The internet has ruined vandalism forever... ;p
(Deleted comment)
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 8th, 2007 12:31 am (UTC) (Link)
It was Wessell when I went there, lo, these many years ago, but yes, now it's Tisch. Same bathrooms. :)

Sometimes there's something amusing on the cannon. Which is pointed at Harvard. (More often, it's just an ad for a party or a political statement of some sort. Talk about your sanctioned vandalism--check out the petrified paint-drippings of a century!)
lilacsigil From: lilacsigil Date: February 8th, 2007 02:58 am (UTC) (Link)
The library stalls were the same at my uni - then the entire bathroom was painted black to prevent it. It was rather gothic and scary for a day or so, then everyone got out the gold and silver markers and made the place interesting again.
dramaturgy From: dramaturgy Date: February 8th, 2007 12:18 am (UTC) (Link)
Run down the street and yell, "I DID IT!"
honorh From: honorh Date: February 8th, 2007 12:44 am (UTC) (Link)
Run down the street naked and yell, "I DID IT!"
dramaturgy From: dramaturgy Date: February 8th, 2007 12:46 am (UTC) (Link)
Touche. :D
lizbee From: lizbee Date: February 8th, 2007 12:55 am (UTC) (Link)
I'd probably get very drunk and go on a celebratory spamming spree at f_w, TLC and all the major fansites.

Maybe that's why some publishers are wary of fanfic authors turning pro...
onionsarelife From: onionsarelife Date: February 8th, 2007 01:30 am (UTC) (Link)
if there was a pool in the hotel I would totally get drunk and go skinny dipping at 3 in the morning. but i suppose if i was that well known it probably would be a bad idea.
sreya From: sreya Date: February 8th, 2007 02:55 am (UTC) (Link)
I'd probably pull out a knife and carve the date and my initials into the desk I'd just finished writing it on. :~p I really loved that idea of autographing books in the bookstore, though, that'd be FUN!
author_by_night From: author_by_night Date: February 8th, 2007 03:09 am (UTC) (Link)
I don't see it being a bad thing that she did at all - I'm completely with you! Yes, juvenile, but she's entitled to be.

Besides, the hotel doesn't seem to mind much.
purple_ladybug1 From: purple_ladybug1 Date: February 8th, 2007 03:53 am (UTC) (Link)
Immediately get on my website and announce it to the world.

Go the the nearest dance club, buy a round of drinks for everyone, and dance the night away while slowly getting intoxicated.

Sign autographs in exchange for drinks from hot guys.
dalf From: dalf Date: February 8th, 2007 08:17 am (UTC) (Link)
What did she do?
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 8th, 2007 01:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
She finished DH in a hotel in Edinburgh (the Balmoral, I think), and scribbled on one of the little decorative statuettes the date and the fact that she'd finished the HP series here, then signed it.
dalf From: dalf Date: February 8th, 2007 03:24 pm (UTC) (Link)
That is both emminently cool, and understandable.

Your ebay point stands is is perhas even understated, depending on how well her mark and signature were left.
lareinenoire From: lareinenoire Date: February 8th, 2007 08:53 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, why do they give her flak for that? She's probably intensely excited that she finally finished the books! And besides, the hotel will make loads of money on it now and in perpetuity so long as the books remain popular as 'The place where JK Rowling finished Harry Potter'.

I'm sure they don't care.

As to how I would celebrate, I think I'd steal someone else's idea, secretly run into the nearest bookshop, and autograph every copy of my book there. And probably drink loads of champagne too.
From: (Anonymous) Date: February 8th, 2007 02:26 pm (UTC) (Link)

i dropped you an email to your gmail.

Hi Fern,

Daniel Ong here. I dropped an email to you.

pls check. thanks!

Daniel.
+86 159 1073 1789.
From: boldsunshine Date: February 8th, 2007 06:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'd go to some tropical island and drink a lot of wine with my good friends.

Then, I'd buy the island. :p
alkari From: alkari Date: February 8th, 2007 07:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
I guess if it's good enough for JKR, it's good enough for any other young vandal or graffiti artist. "Hey - I've just completed ten YEARS at school! WOW!". Ooops, sorry, I forgot - she's filthy rich and famous and can do whatever she damn well pleases.

fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 8th, 2007 08:22 pm (UTC) (Link)
Well, unlike JKR, they don't add value to objects when they do that.

Also, it's still juvenile and stupid. It's just an understandable human reaction.
thewhiteowl From: thewhiteowl Date: February 8th, 2007 09:38 pm (UTC) (Link)
Where was this announced? All I've seen is the fallout.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: February 8th, 2007 09:50 pm (UTC) (Link)
Leaky picked it up from the BBC.
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