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Batch 11 - The Phantom Librarian
Spewing out too many words since November 2003
Batch 11
can I have prefect! Remus doing something prefect-y that doesn't involve his friends? I imagine he'd have been rather good at it, when they weren't involved. for Anon


The timing of the school year was, for once, on Remus's side. The full moon had been nine days ago, so he was fully recovered from the last transformation and not even really thinking about the next one yet. This left him completely free to enjoy his first night as a prefect, and--with the exception of some ribbing from James and Sirius on the train (they'd insisted on turning the carpet runners red for several feet in front of him every time he went somewhere, and bowed to him repeatedly)--he was doing so. He'd made a point of waving to each new Gryffindor as the Sorting went, and during the feast, he'd gone to say hello to them and tell them that he'd be leading them upstairs later. This wasn't strictly in the guidelines, which just said to take them upstairs and explain what they'd need to know, and Remus couldn't remember anyone doing it before (which wasn't to say no one had), but he was so anxious to get started that it had seemed like a good thing to do. He pointed Lily out and she waved, but didn't make any rounds.

The feast seemed to drag on forever. Peter kept daring him to dock points for ridiculous things, and James and Sirius kept skirting right up to the edge of rules, but Remus was feeling generous, so he let it all go. Finally, Professor McGonagall came and gathered Remus and Lily, and started organizing the first years behind them.

"All right," Lily said, "we're going to lead you upstairs." She turned and started up.

Remus noticed that the first years were still looking a little nervous. He smiled at them. "I promise, we won't play any tricks on you, at least until tomorrow." He cast around the entrance hall for something to amuse them, and spotted a portrait of Lysander the Luckless, currently rummaging the long grass in his painting, looking for something. "Lysander!" he called. "Say hello to the first years!"

The old knight shuffled forward and looked at them hopefully. "Can any of you spot my blasted four-leaf clover in this? I've lost it again!"

A girl with curly brown hair--identified at the Sorting as McCulloch, Jenny--giggled. The rest of them smiled or at least relaxed.

"Perhaps they can help you look tomorrow," Remus said to the portrait. He looked at the first years. "Lysander was a Gryffindor, just like you. Did you all get a chance to meet Sir Nicolas?"

They nodded, all a bit more at ease, despite talk of ghosts. Remus had once wondered why Muggle-borns adapted as quickly as they did to the oddnesses at the castle, and his mother had laughed and told him that they'd spent the last few months expecting anything at all. By the time of September the first, he'd guessed--correctly--that they wanted to see as many oddball things as they could.

On the stairs, Lily cleared her throat. "We can look for the clover later," she said. "We really need to get everyone up to bed. Don't you lot want to see your dormitories?" She smiled brightly.

Remus let her lead the way up, and fell to the back to keep anyone from straggling. She seemed to have picked up on what he'd done, and started pointing things out along the way. As they walked, a pink-cheeked girl with black hair dropped back in line and began to match Remus's paces.

"Did you need something"--Remus did a quick memory check of the Sorting--"Hestia?"

She shook her head.

"Oh. Well, did you have a nice ride up on the train?"

She nodded.

"Did you meet any of the others?" He pointed at the rest of the first years.

She looked down sheepishly, then spoke for the first time. "I, er, read a book."

"Really, which one?"

"My new Charms textbook. I think I shall like Charms. Is Charms nice?"

"One of my favorite classes. You'll love Flitwick. It's usually a bit mad in there, though, with everyone doing Charms at the same time. You'll want to have friends in your year to practice with," he prodded gently.

"I'm not very good at that," Hestia said. "My dad's a Muggle, and I went to a Muggle school before, and everyone thought I was strange."

"Everyone's strange," Remus said. "Were you able to work any charms on the train?"

Hestia smiled brightly. "I made my shoelaces glow."

"Perfect. Do that in your dormitory tonight. They'll all ask how, and you can show them, and you'll have friends."

She looked at him distrustfully. "Really?"

"Really. I met my best friends on our first night here, and they're still my best friends. And I promise, I'm... well, at least as strange as you."

Hestia sighed heavily. "I doubt it."

"Will you try anyway? Just the shoelace charm."

"All right."

"Good woman," Remus said, and winked as they came around the last corner and reached the portrait of the Fat Lady. "Welcome to Gryffindor."

what if Sirius liked one of the witches in the old order of phoenix? before all hell broke loose and his life went down in spirals?so something of maybe the same or lesser level of fiona, of sirius liking a witch in the order- maybe Marlene Mckinnnon or dorcas meadow? for Siriusfionafan

Kind of hard, since Sirius was said never to have gotten serious about anyone (so to speak), but that could have been because he didn't know how.

Sirius Black dropped down to the sofa in a dramatic sort of pose.

Lily raised her eyebrows. "Something wrong?"

"I need a woman's advice."

"I have quite a lot," Lily offered. "Starting with whatever you're using on your hair lately. Conditioning potion, really--makes a big difference. And as to going everywhere on that motorbike--"

He rolled his eyes. "About something specific."

"Oh, well, you need to be clearer about that. There are just so many times I want to tell you what to do that I can't restrain myself when given an open invitation." She winked and sat down. "I'm guessing this is regarding Dorcas?"

"Yeah." Sirius sat up, looking quite irritated. "I don't see what she's got against me."

"Nothing that I know of."

"I've asked her to go out five or six times. The last time, she actually laughed at me."

"It could be worse."


"She could have Cursed you. Or slapped you."

"I can handle that." He leaned forward, elbows on his knees. "I'm doing all the things I normally do, and they always work, except this time."

"This could, potentially, be because Dorcas has seen you do all the things you normally do about a dozen times. Didn't the pair of you keep an eye on a pub for a week?"

"Yes, when my cousin's husband had us thinking he was going to blow one up."

"And how many girls did you try 'all the usual things' on?"

"I don't know. I had to maintain a cover. Meadows did her fair share of flirting, too." He frowned. "We actually got invited home by a couple. The husband asked if I wanted to swap for the night."

"Charming," Lily said. "The point is, Dorcas knows how you operate."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Lily shook her head. "Sirius, you know I love you, don't you?"


"Well, keeping that in mind--you're a complete prat about women. Dorcas knows that."

"Women love me!"

"Nineteen year old girls out to have a good time love you for a day or two. A twenty-six year old woman with an eye toward marriage thinks you look like a spectacularly bad opportunity."

Sirius drew up and an expression of offense crossed his face so deeply that he looked like his mother being forced to dine with a Muggle-born half-breed giant. "I'm a great opportunity!"

"You know, I think somewhere, deep down, you are. If you could show half the loyalty to a girl you go out with that you show to James and Remus and Peter--"

"And you!"

"--and me," Lily agreed, "then you'd have a spot better luck with girl who's actually a grown-up."

"But I'm not really looking to marry someone, at least not yet."

"That's obvious to any woman who crosses your path. That's what I'm trying to tell you."

"But if I were, I like Dorcas. We get on well. And I love it when she does her hair up like McGonagall. Cracks me up. If she's turning me down because I don't want to get married, well, how would I ever end up changing my mind? I mean, she should think about that."

"You're really not getting this, are you?"

"What am I meant to get?"

"If you want to ask out a woman instead of a girl, ask her out as a man instead of a boy."

"Hmm," Sirius said. "Flowers, a dinner date, that sort of thing?"

"It doesn't matter what you do. Just stop playing a part and be yourself. Grown-up women don't like rehearsed lines."

He thought about this. "I could say..." His brow furrowed. "Well, dammit, Lily, if I can't rehearse, how am I to decide what to say?"

"It'll come to you." She went to the sofa and pulled him up by his hands. "Go forth, young man. Gryffindor spirit and all of that."

He squared his shoulders. "All right. Into the lion's den. Or the badger's, as I think the case was."

He walked out the door. Lily watched him head down to the motorbike, flirt with three girls who happened to be walking down the street, then ride off with a jaunty wave.

22 comments or Leave a comment
beceh From: beceh Date: December 10th, 2009 09:29 am (UTC) (Link)
Ahhhh, wonderful, wonderful. Especially loved Sirius. Reminds me of some guys I know!!

Thanks :-)
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:47 am (UTC) (Link)
And they never seem to figure it out, do they?
From: severely_lupine Date: December 10th, 2009 11:18 am (UTC) (Link)
I see it pays to get online in the middle of the night.

Ah, I do love how you write Remus, in all his phases of life.

"If you want to ask out a woman instead of a girl, ask her out as a man instead of a boy." -- Great line, and great advice. It's unfortunate Sirius never really had a chance to become a proper grown-up.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:47 am (UTC) (Link)
I love Remus, in all phases of his life.

I do feel sorry that Sirius got locked up at just a horrible time in a young man's life. They do so much growing up in the twenties!
From: (Anonymous) Date: December 10th, 2009 02:13 pm (UTC) (Link)
Both of these were excellent, Fern. Prefect Remus is just darling, as always, and it was a nice surprise to see young Hestia. Sirius and Lily were hilarious; I love how you write both of them--delightfully clueless Sirius, and Lily balancing very good advice with humour. It makes me wonder for the umpteenth time what would have become of Sirius if Haloe'en 1981 hadn't happened, but because of Lily this time.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:49 am (UTC) (Link)
I was very glad that the letter to Sirius was from Lily. It reinforced that the simplistic notion after the fifth book--evil Marauders just annoyed Lily--was wrong. I mean, sheesh... why so quick to diminish the relationship that CREATED HARRY?
keestone From: keestone Date: December 10th, 2009 02:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
I just want to hug your Remus.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:49 am (UTC) (Link)
I always want to hug Remus.
thunderemerald From: thunderemerald Date: December 10th, 2009 04:04 pm (UTC) (Link)
Loved them both! Remus is terrifically adorable in the first, and I especially love your cheeky Lily in the second. :)
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:50 am (UTC) (Link)
I wasn't sure what to do with the prompt, mainly because the only thing that kept entering my brain was an amused Lily trying to walk Sirius through this.
etain_antrim From: etain_antrim Date: December 10th, 2009 04:57 pm (UTC) (Link)
Remus is so cute, but also thoughtful and proud. *Pats his shoulder* And Sirius -- what a great scene! Honestly, I applaud Lily for trying, but this Sirius isn't ready. How sad to think he never will be.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:50 am (UTC) (Link)
He really isn't ready. He didn't have a very good attachment to his family, which doesn't bode well for later attachments.
From: (Anonymous) Date: December 11th, 2009 05:00 am (UTC) (Link)

wait does that mean he could have never had a chance to begin with?

let's just say, for sake of argument, that sirius had the change to live longer

are you saying that even then he would have NEVER been able to form a lasting meaningful relationship, and have a family?

because it seems possibly, within the circumstances however short they are, with Fiona

so please explain your comment

Bethanny anne
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 05:10 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: wait does that mean he could have never had a chance to begin with?

No--just that it would take him longer. He does have James and Lily and Harry. His attachment problem with his family probably delayed his maturity a bit--he's stuck in the "dashing rebel" mode a little longer than his friends are. It's a problem he'd probably live with to some extent--insecurity about attachments covered with either bravado or deep and unquestioning loyalty--but not an insurmountable one if he settles down. But he's loved and part of things, and, had he gone on and not gone to Azkaban, he probably would have straightened up and flown right a lot sooner.
malinbe From: malinbe Date: December 10th, 2009 09:49 pm (UTC) (Link)
Both Remus and Sirius are in for a hug.

Sirius is just like I imagine him. He was in that phase and he was supposed to be gorgeous, so I doubt he could snap out of it for a few years more. :(

Loved them, Fern!
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:51 am (UTC) (Link)
And it's too bad--I agree with Lily that the loyalty he shows his friends probably would have eventually made him a terrific husband and father.
hungrytiger11 From: hungrytiger11 Date: December 11th, 2009 01:38 am (UTC) (Link)
Lovely, the both of them. I really liked Sirius and Lily's relationship the "And you!" line. Yeah. That just made it for me.

Remus seems like the type you'd want to have there, helping you your first night far from home and in very strange circumstances indeed! You can see here how and why he would make such a good teacher.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:51 am (UTC) (Link)
Well, I'd want Remus around, anyway. ;p
alkari From: alkari Date: December 11th, 2009 03:19 am (UTC) (Link)
Loved both of them. Remus trying so hard to live up to an honour he obviously never expected at school, and understanding young Hestia so quickly. You can just see him spending that first train trip with his head in a book too. Great reactions and teasing from his friends.

Sirius is age-perfect: loved your last line description! I know JKR has some of her characters finding their 'one true love' at a very early age and marrying young, but how common is that, really? I reckon Sirius would not have been ready to settle down until his mid-late twenties, but then as Lily can see, he would have been totally loyal to the (lucky!) woman.
fernwithy From: fernwithy Date: December 11th, 2009 04:53 am (UTC) (Link)
I think it's probably more common in the Wizarding World than the real world--after all, there's no going off to university, or going out to "find yourself" before taking on an apprenticeship which leads to a job. You work with the same people you went to school with. There's probably a lot more of the marrying the school sweetheart going on. Conversely, if you didn't happen to meet anyone special at school, it might take a long longer to find anyone new.
chrischewscud From: chrischewscud Date: December 11th, 2009 05:15 am (UTC) (Link)
I don't have any specific comments for these, but I'd just like to say thank you for doing them. I just started a new job, and it's been so lovely to have wonderful Fern-fic to look forward to when I come home tired. Thank you, I've really enjoyed all your stories.
From: (Anonymous) Date: December 16th, 2009 06:29 pm (UTC) (Link)

awwwww the sirius one!

that was just such a pretty ficlet! what a nice twist you did with my request!

the interaction between sirius and lily made me smile very guide. also that hint of Sirius thinking over the possibility of marrying *possibly dorcas* was great. how i wish that had happened.

thank you

22 comments or Leave a comment