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The Wedding Guitar, pt 1 (Coco) - The Phantom Librarian — LiveJournal
Spewing out too many words since November 2003
The Wedding Guitar, pt 1 (Coco)
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From: queen_bellatrix Date: March 26th, 2018 05:34 am (UTC) (Link)
Starting this a bit late, but noticed you hadn't put up on AO3 yet, so thought I'd keep an eye peeled for typos in part 1.

didn't speak for minute Just need an a before minute.

ever seem strange you? Just need a to before the you there.

aware on some level, Think maybe you put an extra comma in the sentence here?

world go come and go Just need that first go to be a to.

than once her absence Think you need an in? or some other word before her.

Ok holy hell, this is the fic I needed and didn't even know I wanted until you started writing this. Your Imelda is just flawless! with her will, but all her insecurities. This Imelda, who knows the stories she constructs for herself have a flaw at their core, explains so. so much about how she and Hector could be reconciled in the land of the dead post-Miguel.

And I love that you're continuing to expand on that fascinating theme of yours, about the family being broken. Imelda's brokenness is clear, with how much she wants to understand about Hector, how much she misses and craves her music. But Coco's is fascinating, striving so to be the dutiful daughter, repressing so. so much. She's a deeply intriguing forerunner to Miguel, and you've just expanded marvelously on that really tiny tidbit we get re Miguel feeling much more comfortable talking to her than anyone else. To have her have her own spark of rebellion is just such a fitting explanation for that.

And ooo, all the revolution/history tidbits in this: I'm very. very fascinated to see how they continue to interweave. And to see you tackle a nonlinear story, as I don't recall you doing that before. Will be profoundly delighted to sit down with part 2 after a long Monday!
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