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Batch 49 - The Phantom Librarian
Spewing out too many words since November 2003
Batch 49
Some James - Celia friendship,at school or later, please!
for Anon

Celia left France as early as Mother Viv would let her on the day after transformation, and got back to Hogwarts just as the sun was rising (it did so considerably later this far north, in the middle of winter). She was still tired and achy, and a little bit cranky, but she wanted to get back in time for breakfast, as it was Aimee Weasley's fifteenth birthday and a good lot of the girls in Gryffindor had been planning a surprise party. Celia had promised--before looking at the calendar--to direct the ghost chorus in singing "Happy Birthday."

So, after Professor Longbottom let her in, she walked briskly up the path, trying to shake off the last of the transformation and shed it off into the cold morning air. By the time she reached the castle, her head, at least, was clear, and the sharp pains in her feet had dulled to occasional pinching sensations. She Summoned her broom to go up the stairs to the seventh floor, as it would be considerably quicker than walking in this state. It was against the rules for anyone else to fly a broom inside, but Neil had made the case for her after a bad transformation during her first year, and no one had ever given her trouble about it. She was aware in an academic way that there'd once been real difficulties in being a werewolf, but, for Celia's money, the annoyance of transformation was more than enough trouble to put up with for the sin of having been attacked. Anything else piled on it was just egregious.

She reached the Fat Lady and gave the password, auribus teneo lupum, which Marie Weasley always set it to the day after transformation, just for Celia--she claimed it meant "I have the wolf by the ears," and Celia had no reason to doubt her.

When the portrait opened, she found James Potter crouched by the wall, trying to prise out a loose skirting board that he used to hide his store of particularly good Wheezes.

"I think one of the elves repaired that," Celia said.

James made a face and aimed his wand at it. The crack appeared again, and he pulled the loosened board away. "Good thing I Transfigured all of it, or they'd have confiscated it."

"Right, and it's difficult to get Winky to return things." Celia rolled her eyes. "You might have to actually ask for it."

"We have no challenges," James said. He pulled out several curls of dust, tapped them with his wand, and turned them back into boxes of fireworks and pranks. "Filch was the last one, and now that he's retired, what have we got? Winky."

"It's a triumph for elf rights," Celia offered.

"I support elf rights, but it's not any fun," James said. "No threats about being whipped, or file drawers full of things. What will my grandchildren find in the cellar? I found a wonderful stash of things to do." He sighed. "I'm glad I rescued all of Filch's records on the Marauders and Dad and Uncle Ron before Winky started cleaning up down there. That's all my descendants will have to go on."

"I don't have the sense that any descendant of yours will have difficulty finding ways to get into trouble."

"I don't know," James said. "They're threatening to make me a prefect next year. That can't bode well." He looked her over carefully. "Any bites or scratches?"

"I dislocated my shoulder, but Coral fixed it before I left. I just want to get some rest." She went to the sofa and lay down, putting her feet up on the armrest.

James took the chair across from her and leaned forward, elbows on his knees. "I was going through the files," he said. "My grandfather and Sirius snuck out into Hogsmeade once and put an Everflow Hex on Madam Rosmerta's toilets."

"What does that do?"

"Makes them flush over and over. They made it so they played a little tune, I think."

"So you wanted to do that?"

"No. Rosmerta's son's a raving lunatic. No fun to play pranks on him. But I thought we could sneak out and do something in Hogsmeade. Maybe Weasley's Zonks. Lee wouldn't mind."

"It has possibilities. What do you have in mind?"

He sat back, frowning thoughtfully. "I haven't decided yet. I don't want to do anything too nasty, but Lee won't respect me if it's too... you know, if it's not enough."

"You could put a Disappearing Hex on the merchandise. Just enough to make him do a double-take, but as soon as he guesses it's a trick, it deactivates."

"Hmm. I think it shouldn't just disappear. Maybe we could make it so that clues show up until he figures it out and breaks the hex. That would be good. The shop opens late on Saturdays, except on Hogsmeade weekends. So if we do it some other time, we could do it Friday night, and he'll have time to figure out the puzzle before opening."

"And how do you propose getting out? The tunnels are all blocked. Or collapsed, thanks to Teddy."

James considered this. "You know, I don't think either Lee or Professor Longbottom would want Hogwarts inaccessible."

"And yet," Celia said, raising an eyebrow.

"I've been thinking about it, and I've been listening, and this summer, I went to Zonks, and I offered to work there for a day and I went down to the cellar to get some inventory. There's a suspiciously new looking trapdoor."


James nodded. "I couldn't go down it, but where else would it lead? They were all trapped in here during the war, and then they had to go through that portrait to get in and out, because everyone knew about the tunnels. I'll bet bloody Wormtail told them. Anyway, I think that Lee and Professor Longbottom have started making escape routes again. We just need to find out where the exit is here. Sounds like a project, doesn't it?"

"Hmm," Celia said.

"You're going for an Herbology N.E.W.T., aren't you?"


"So you have the run of the greenhouses." James raised his eyebrows significantly.

"Ah. So you want me to find signs of excavations."


Celia sat up and bit her lip. "If I were Professor Longbottom, I'd hide it under all the fertilizer he makes people sift for detention. I mean, who'd go digging?"

"Good point." James looked at his watch. "Care for a fertilizer dig before breakfast?"

If it is not too late could I please have some more on Dudley's son and Mira, perhaps meeting the grandparents? Or another Dudley and Harry discussion.
for Anon

Dad had asked Dudley Dursley to make sure all of his children knew how to defend themselves without magic, and Dudley had been very conscientious about it, at least when they were little. He said little children couldn't do anything with boxing or hitting, so he'd asked his wife, Kelsey, to teach them enough karate to get away in a jam. Most of Mira's brothers and sisters had stopped there, but Mira rather enjoyed the dojo near Little Whinging, and Dad had never seen any harm in letting her study. She made blackbelt the year before Hogwarts. There was no question, of course, of attending the dojo after leaving for school, but she did come back during the summers. Dudley's son, Vern, was teaching classes now. Quite illegally, he knew why the Lupin children disappeared for long periods of time, and why no one seemed to know about their school, their parents' professions, or even where they lived. This made him Mira's ideal sparring partner, even though he was a foot taller and four years older. They'd spent a pleasant morning doing katas, and then practicing tournament moves on each other, and at lunchtime, Mira asked Vern if he wanted to go have a bite at the restaurant around the corner.

"Is it one of... yours?"

"No. The new German place around the corner."

"Oh. Right." Vern considered it, then shook his head. "I told my grandparents I'd drop by. Would you like to come? My grandmother's a pretty good cook."

This sounded like a suitably unusual way to spend the afternoon, so Mira got into Vern's car and went with him through the staid, well-manicured neighborhoods of Little Whinging, until they came to Privet Drive (she wasn't sure how he could recognize it, as it looked like every other street in this section of town, but she supposed he'd been here enough to know). Number four was a neat little house like the ones to either side of it, with a fussy little flower patch under the windows. Mira couldn't imagine Uncle Harry living in this neighborhood, though she found it oddly plausible that he had tended these flowers, which were in the same configuration as the ones at Fawkes' Fire, his new house at Torchester. Mira had asked Aunt Ginny if she'd planted the little patches, and she'd laughed merrily at the idea of such formality.

They approached the door, and Vern pressed a button on the right side of it. Very loud chimes played on the other side.

"They've got a bit deaf," Vern explained.

The door opened, and an extremely thin woman appeared. Her snow white hair had been cropped and curled very smartly, and Mira suspected it was the same style worn by neighbors of her age everywhere on the street. She smiled. "Ah, Vern, darling! I'm so happy you could come." She took in Mira. "Who's your friend?"

"Mira Lupin," Vern said. "Mira, this is my grandmother, Petunia Dursley." He smiled. "She's your uncle Harry's aunt. Gran, could Mira call you Aunt Petunia?"

The woman had looked up, very slowly, and her already pale face grew positively white. "You're... Harry's."

Vern made a motion with his hand to indicate wand-waving. "You know," he said.

"Oh. Oh, yes, I'm a witch," Mira said. "I forgot you'd know that. I think you met my grandfather. Remus Lupin?"

"The... were... er..."

"Yes," Mira said.

"Gran? Could we come in?" Vern asked.

"Yes, yes, of course," Petunia said and opened the door. She looked nervously at Mira. "You might want to keep that bit of information to yourself. My husband's heart isn't as strong as it once was. He's had two operations," she added with a touch of pride.

Mira frowned, then remembered that the stories of Uncle Harry's childhood hadn't been entirely cheerful in regard to his guardian. She glanced at Vern, who just looked puzzled (he'd apparently never raised the subject with his grandparents before) and shrugged.

Petunia led the way into the house, which had an odd smell to it. It was dominated by dried flowers and cleaning potions, but under it was an odor that Mira couldn't identify, an old, unpleasant smell that made her think of the wrappings around mummies. They came to the parlor, which was filled with pictures of Dudley--Dudley as a small boy, Dudley as a teenager, Dudley's wedding (only one of this set included Kelsey), and Dudley playing with little Vern. In one photograph from the wedding, Dudley's arm was around a man who was cut off in the middle of his face, and Mira realized with a start that the little black-rimmed glasses she could see half of were perched on the bisected nose of Harry Potter. It was the only trace she saw of him on her first glance, though subsequent looks throughout the afternoon revealed a tiny framed picture of a black-haired baby, and a Muggle version of Harry's own wedding picture, which was three by five inches, and lost among several other small photographs on the bottom shelf of an end table.

Sitting on the love seat--and taking it up entirely--was a man who looked something like a walrus. He was huge, and his white mustache seemed to form tusks. His little sunken eyes glittered out.

"Look who's here, Vernon," Petunia said. "It's Vern, and he's brought a friend from... where did you say you were from, dear?" She gave Mira a frozen smile.

"The dojo," Mira said, honestly enough. She held out her hand to Vernon Dursley. "My name is Mira," she said. "It's nice to meet you, sir."

Vernon sat back, impressed. "Sir, yet."

"Yes, well," Petunia fluttered around the room, straightening things. "I"m sure any of Vern's friends are delightful. I have lunch ready for everyone. I thought we might eat here. Grandfather is comfortable in his chair."

"Lovely idea," Vern said enthusiastically. "Can Mira and I bring in a table?"

She looked panicked, then leaned in and said, quietly enough for Vernon not to hear, "Yes, but please do it... normally."

Mira rolled her eyes. She was two years away from being of age to do magic out of school anyway.

Vern gestured to her, and she followed him to the dining room, where a table with leaves raised sat in a bar of dusty sunlight. Together, they lowered the leaves, and turned it to head for the door.

"I'm sorry," Vern said. "I knew Dad said they were a bit odd on the subject, but--"

"It's all right," Mira told him.

"No, it's not."

"I'll think of it as a game. See how much I can impress them with just how 'normal' a witch can be."

"I think you're fighting a losing battle," Vern said.

11 comments or Leave a comment
purple_ladybug1 From: purple_ladybug1 Date: February 12th, 2009 08:42 am (UTC) (Link)

Only have time to read the second story. Very cute, but I was thrown off by you starting with "Dad..." I didn't know who Dad referred to until I reread the first two paragraphs several times to put it together.

Love Mira and Vern! Very cute.
amamama From: amamama Date: February 12th, 2009 08:58 am (UTC) (Link)
Woot! Love James and Celia coming up with new pranks and exploring Hogwarts. And Winky as the caretaker is a wonderful idea! One I wholeheartedly support.

Vern and Mira have a wonderful friendship, and Petunia and Vernon are ... themselves. I think that's the most positive I can say, though Petunia has obviously mellowed over the years, she didn't screech once or slam the door in their faces or deny Mira access. Heh. Cool.

From: severely_lupine Date: February 12th, 2009 09:12 am (UTC) (Link)
Haha, that second one was cute. In a sort of sad way. There's something very pitiable about the Dursleys. I'm glad that your Dudley has gotten away from that, at least.
shortysc22 From: shortysc22 Date: February 12th, 2009 01:05 pm (UTC) (Link)
I love the second one and would love to read more about that. Great job on both, as always..
malinbe From: malinbe Date: February 12th, 2009 02:22 pm (UTC) (Link)
Mira + Uncle Vernon = UNCOMFORTABLE = Quite fun for us!

This was very amusing, if a little sad.

I love how Celia being a werewolf is simply not an issue anymore. It's nice to see how people and society grow.
summoner_lenne9 From: summoner_lenne9 Date: February 12th, 2009 08:31 pm (UTC) (Link)
I, err, ATTEMPTED to just figure it out. I THINK Vern and Mira are third cousins? Umm, well, Harry is Mira's great uncle, so would that make Dudley her second cousin? And then Vern her third?


Oh whatever.

Nice little story, well both of course- I LOVE Celia man, though the idea of her looking through fertilizer after a full moon is just cruel- but it's a bit unrealistic that at 15, and only being able to practice during the Summer, Mira has a black belt in karate.

*Has studied lots of martial arts her whole life, heh*

hermia7 From: hermia7 Date: February 12th, 2009 08:42 pm (UTC) (Link)
I don't think they are related except by marriage--isn't Kelsey a muggle? So Dudley and Kelsey have Vern, Mira is the daughter of Teddy and Victoire, Victoire is Harry's neice by marriage.
summoner_lenne9 From: summoner_lenne9 Date: February 12th, 2009 08:46 pm (UTC) (Link)
........ Oh. You have a point there.

*Gets easily confused by these things, heh*
From: (Anonymous) Date: February 18th, 2009 10:35 pm (UTC) (Link)
Mira and Vern/Dudley/Vernon
are only related through marriage. (Harry & Ginny's)
Which connects the Evans to the Weasleys, and thus to Teddy.
westingturtle From: westingturtle Date: February 13th, 2009 06:29 am (UTC) (Link)
"It's all right," Mira told him.

"No, it's not."

Oh, bless his heart.
shiiki From: shiiki Date: February 13th, 2009 12:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
I do so adore your next-gen kids ... or rather, I should say next-next-gen, since technically Mira is two generations down. You make them so wonderfully lively and lovable!
11 comments or Leave a comment